SEOUL – South Korean pop singer Kim Jong-hyun, who died in Seoul on Monday at the age of 27 in an apparent suicide, left a farewell note that was made public on Tuesday, detailing his depressive state.
The note was published on Instagram by singer Jang Hee-yeon, of the Dear Cloud band and a close friend of Kim.
“I am damaged from the inside. The depression that has been slowly eating away at me has completely swallowed me, and I couldn’t win over it … It’s amazing how much I’m hurting … Out of everyone alive, there’s no one hurting more than I am and there’s no one weaker than I am,” the letter written by the vocalist read.
The note, written at an unknown date and sent to Jang, also seems to express regret over the singer’s public exposure.
“They said that was why I was hurting more. Because I had clashed with the world, because I was known to the world. Why did I choose this? That’s funny.”
The singer-friend of Kim consulted with her family before publicly releasing the letter, which concludes with a message very similar to the one that the artist sent on Monday to his sister’s phone, who notified the police.
The agents went to an apartment that Kim rented in Seoul, where they found him already unconscious due to the inhalation of gases.
“That it was good of me to come this far. That I worked hard. Even if you can’t smile as you let me go, please don’t blame me. I worked hard. I really did work hard. Goodbye,” the letter concluded.
Seoul police have chosen not to perform an autopsy, an option that the artist’s family also supports, given the signs of suicide.
Kim made his debut in May 2008 as lead singer of SHINee, one of the most renowned boy bands in K-Pop, and from there he developed a prolific career as a soloist and songwriter, in addition to being an actor in film and television.
The singer had just finished performing his solo concert on Dec. 9-10 in Seoul, recording a performance for a television program to be broadcast on Christmas Eve and scheduling concerts in February in Japan, so many of his fans have been shocked by this tragedy.
The agency that represented him – S.M. Entertainment – plans to open a space at the Asan Medical Center in Seoul so that his fans can pay tribute to him.